Looking up – Life on endless levels

I have a lot of photos in my storage across many places. I have a google album that is full, and then another under my personal gmail account. I have a full hard drive on a computer that ONLY has photos on it. I removed every single application and program that I didn’t need and wouldn’t affect the machine’s performance or operating system and the entire thing is photos. Some are so old, Colt is a baby. I really started taking photos when Colt was born. My foster family gave me a digital camera (very cheap point and shoot but they thought it a nice idea since I was expecting. They were stunned into silence when I burst into tears upon opening my gift. I had always wanted a camera – even a shitty one. I used to buy those throw away ones they sold at drug stores and photo development places (remember those guys? Blacks Photography and … ohhhh the orange and yellow one….they guaranteed your film to be developed in an hour…..that’s going to bug me now).

For those of you who do not have any idea what I’m talking about (Colt tilted his head to the side like a confused puppy and asked me to repeat myself when I tried to explain that there was a time when the only phone you could use was attached to a wall or phone both and photos were taken on a roll of film that had to be developed…..)

“But, why wouldn’t you just save the pictures on your phone?”

“Because phones didn’t take pictures back then Colt”

“So what? You had to have a camera and a phone? Like you do now?”

“Yes, more or less.”

“…..Then why didn’t you just upload your photos onto your laptop?”

I didn’t even try to start the “we didn’t have laptops or even home computers when I was a kid” conversation.

Now, we just keep everything in some virtual cloud. That idea still seems kind of magical to me.

Clouds rolling by – early morning in the late summer
Even storm clouds are beautiful when you can see the layers and depth within

Fall in the moments before

There is a really special time of year around here where the weather begins to cool and the trees are cued to start to turn and prepare for their winter sleep. We always have a few weeks of a second summer – it gets cold and then we hit a week of gorgeous summer weather. This halts the leaves and it’s like they wait for that time to pass so they can explode into rich, glowing reds, oranges, yellows at every depth and brightness.

It’s the moment before everything begins to hunker down for the winter. I love it more than any other time of year.

Fall past and soon to come

I came upon some photos I took last fall. I don’t remember the colours being so vibrant but wow, I’m glad I didn’t delete this folder without flipping through the files first. 🙂

…and then there’s the lake……

These all bring on a feeling of silence and peace; just the wind in the trees and the soft lapping water as the gentle tide pulls the waterline back from the land.

Here, I could stay forever. Aren’t photos incredible? The moment of the memory captured with the image. Pure magic.

Reflections, Perspective and Memorial Intentions

I constantly wonder why I am so drawn to things like this building.  I will be sitting in the passenger seat of the truck, out on a weekend with the family, and I’ll see something like this building in the distance and my entire being calls me to stop, capture, analyze.

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Sometimes I think it’s because I see beauty where others may not and I’m full of myself enough to think I can show what I see.  Sometimes I rationalize that the state of the place makes me think they’ll tear it down sometime soon and that lack of permanence makes me want to capture it before it’s gone.

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Things being there and then suddenly being gone; particularly when I least expect it, has always been a *thing* for me.  People, family, places, memories; it messes with me to realize that nothing is forever and nothing is ever guaranteed.

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If I could wrangle a promise out of the universe that things would just stay the same for a day, I would be willing to sacrifice quite a bit.  Finding that balance in life is hard for me and for many others, I realize, so maybe I’m just making sure that these things; places; buildings that were once loved and called home to someone, are never totally relegated to the pile of dust and then empty space they will eventually become.

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Like a memorial stone in a graveyard, my photos can keep something alive, in a way, that might vanish from the world at any moment.  Once a few years pass and people move on, no one will even remember that this house once existed.

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(It just dawned on me why I take photos of myself and save them, although I rarely share them with anyone. *chills*)

 

 

The Moon

 

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The moon has always been one of those things in nature that captivate me.  I wondered as a child, how it could be possible to see the moon at night, but also at times through the day.  As I grew and learned about how the universe works, it began to make sense from a physics point of view, however, I still find myself feeling a spark of excitement and wonder when I see the moon hovering in the middle of a daytime sky.

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That moment; that spark of wonder;  I think that’s something we are all missing out on.  I’m going to spend time searching for the things that ignite my curiosity and spend more of the precious time I’ve been given in this life filling my soul with wonder and the beautiful world around me, rather than wading waist-deep in the muck through the synthetic reality society dictates.

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I’m not saying this will change much of who I am, but it certainly can’t hurt now, can it?

Freeze and flow

The winter season is when I tend to stay indoors more often so my camera doesn’t get to go on as many outings as it does in warmer weather.  This day, I was just going grocery shopping but decided to take my camera along.

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I’ll find myself thinking that winter is ‘bland’ through the lens, unless you’re shooting something specific, because it’s either dead, brown twigs that used to be lush green trees, mucky slop on the roads mixed with sand and salt from the plows or pure, blinding snow.

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Bland or otherwise, I went out with my camera and without even trying I pulled over at various spots along my drive and captured the things that caught my eye.

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There is something complex and lovely about the way that winter looks, even though the colours are not as vibrant and everything is half hidden by snow.

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It was then I realized that winter was just as lovely as summer.  I had been missing so many chances to capture beautiful scenes around me that would only ever exist once.

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So here’s to blindingly white snow, half-dead looking twigs and stems and the biting cold wind that ices and frosts everything in its path.